上個周末囘梹城一趟，告訴別人，我純粹是爲了探訪在梹城的朋友們，沒有人相信。難道我不像是會做這種事的人嗎？所以後來改口說：我來幫和生搬家的，或者，我來看我的女朋友的。
之前每次回來梹城都有一點不開心，每次都期待可以跟很多人見面，可是每次每個人都在忙自己的事情，除了詩亮和和生，還真的沒有人管我。所以這次學精了，回來之前，我就把時間表安排好了。我要善用回來的48小時，結果我真的把48小時都填滿了。偶爾做一些瘋狂的事情，對於我來説，這樣纔是活得精彩。
星期五（16/01/09）
4.45pm 獲得特赦，提早十五分鐘下班，爲的是趕5.30pm囘梹城的巴士。事前最擔心的是新來那個同事做東西又慢條斯理，害我不能準時下班。她果然沒有讓我失望，臨下班又給我搞來大件事，壓抑著自己的怒氣，靜靜的替她收拾手尾。幸好阿姨心情好，叫我不要管了，所以可以準時走人。走的時候還是忍不住心裏罵了新同事幾句。
5.30pm 準時上了巴士，開始聼著 mp3，邁開漫長的旅途。
10.30pm 到了梹城。巴士還是沒有辦法打破我三個小時半從吉隆坡抵達梹城又沒有收到肉乾的紀錄。
11.00pm 吃完非常想念的馬來餐（Sri Saujana Apartment 對面的馬來檔口），回到臨時酒店(Ucare)，Marvin 在等著我。看著他等待的表情讓人心情很愉快，好像一個小孩子心急地等待收到聖誕禮物的表情。
11.30pm 洗好澡，和生也過來了。3個男人在房裏喝酒看戯。這種畫面讓人忍不住想到3個色鬼躲在房裏看三級片的畫面。我們沒有，我們首先看了王家衛的《重慶森林》，然後又看高志森的《花田喜事》。我跟Marvin看《重慶森林》看得津津有味，才發現和生一點都看不懂。看《花田喜事》時，其實每個畫面我跟Marvin都非常熟悉了，才發現和生原來根本沒看過這部經典賀嵗電影，而且他竟然看喜劇時睡着了。不可思議！
星期六（17/01/09）
4.00am 和生睡了，我們也只好睡了。酒杯，零食丟滿地，三個男人擠在一起就睡了。我喜歡這樣，覺得自己更放蕩不羈讓我覺得很自豪。
7.00am 手機閙鈴響了，賴床半個小時，起來沖涼。
8.00am 忍不住再看了一下《春光襍泄》和《家有喜事》
9.00am 約了Chee Oh吃早餐，其實最擔心就是約不到他，因爲他每次都告訴我他很忙，沒時間。
10.00am 剪頭髮，頭髮已經很長了，可是爲了回來梹城剪，忍了很久。我還是比較滿意我這個髮型師的剪法。我告訴他：剪短！哈哈，青春洋溢的威威王子又回來了！我還是適合剪短髮。
12.00pm 載煒賓去買新年衣。我告訴他我今天只是打算看你賣，我不要賣的。可是說的時候，心裏有股不祥的預感，到最後提著最多袋子出來的應該會是我。暈倒，還真的是真的。只好安慰自己：沒辦法，要怪就怪自己模特兒的身材，穿上什麽都覺得那件衣服應該是爲了我而存在的，如果不買它生存還有什麽意思呢？做善事本來就是我的愛好。哇哈哈哈哈哈！
5.00pm 該輪倒她了，不然她就要發瘋了！早上詩亮要到學校教書，所以她特准我去找別人，但是已經規定晚上的時間一定要給她。約會的時候，吃飯是其中一個我最討厭的事，因爲要問她：你要吃什麽？然後她就會陷入沉思，很久很久，可以看到她頭上出現很多地方。但是到最後，還是要勞累我想去哪裏吃的。突然想起她整天暗示我帶她去《KIM GARRY》，所以就帶她去了。問她這裡東西好吃咩？她說：沒有什麽特別啊！那麽什麽一直吵我帶你來？因爲我喜歡咯！暈倒，跟我久了，越來越像我一樣了。做事不按常理，捉摸不定，沒有理由。換成我的語言，就是：神經的！哈哈，神經公神經婆，我覺得比金童玉女更順耳！
10.30pm 晚上還能做什麽呢？當然是去喝酒啦！大哥帶我去梹城著名的酒吧街，第一次來這麽亂的地方。我是覺得詩亮不習慣這種生活的，但是我超喜歡的。我擧得像這種個性兩極化的時候，她是沒有必要勉強自己配合我的，但是她就是要。所以也帶她來了。我是不介意讓他看我發酒瘋的樣子，因爲我覺得我應該在結婚前就讓她看到我最真實的樣子，就好像她跟我回家的時候，我不會刻意輕聲細語跟我阿嫲講話，因爲這樣只是間接欺騙她，所以我還是一樣跟我阿嫲喊來喊去。哈哈，她一定想不明白，爲什麽這兩婆孫講話都是這樣喊來喊去的？喝酒好開心，因爲我只需要出命不需要出錢。不知道爲什麽，就是喜歡那種欲醉還醒的感覺。喝到一半就有人在打架，突然想起一句話：不要去那些隔天會讓你上新聞頭條的地方。所以就散會了。
星期日（18/01/09）
1.00am 原本還要繼續瘋狂的時間表，但是好悃，又有點醉醺醺，所以還是睡吧！到吉隆坡那麽多個月以來，第一次我是可以在完全沒發夢的情況下安睡的夜晚。
6.00am 要起床了，約了嘉翕吃早餐，我日思夜思的好弟兄！
7.00am 真討厭，我約他7.ooam 吃早餐，他竟然跟我7.00am 才起床。在 Tasik Aman 邊養蚊子養了20分鐘，他終于出現了。結果卻輪到我出狀況，早餐還沒送上，肚子就痛到要死了。喝酒能通便，好像是對的。我覺得我跟嘉翕沒緣份，每次我囘梹城他就離開梹城，就連好不容易見到面了狀況還是不斷。顯......
9.00am 玩了那麽多，應該做一些正經事了。所以去了教會找牧師聊天。問了他一些困擾我很久的信仰問題。有些聖經沒有直接説明，但是每個人會用不同的觀點跟你説教的問題。我不想聼人怎麽想，我只想知道神怎麽想。這個世界越來越黑白不能分明了，加恩說的：灰！我不要灰，我要黑白分明。灰色地帶的教導只是為做錯事的人編制一個可以信服的理由，但是未必適合神的心意的。
11.00am 主日崇拜。驚然發現每個人在各方面都進步了。敬拜讚美團，主持見證分享的，証道的，全部都有顯著的進步。突然想起建彬說的：某些信徒事奉不火熱，是因爲他們還不能明白神的教導，但是不代表他們以後不會明白，他們只需要時間。因爲他的這句話，我已經警惕自己，不要去論斷別人的事奉。我很感恩，所以在敬拜讚美時我流淚了。
1.00pm 教會有新年慶祝聚餐。哇，好開心，可以看到我親愛的乾姐姐，還有好多人。
2.30pm 最後的衝刺，三只小瓜（Jefferey, Marcus 和我）聚在McD 聊天。我問Jeff，我們都走了，幾時到你。沒想到他還真的工作不愉快，他說工作壓力大。我沒辦法說安慰的話，因爲我可以了解，工作的壓力，工作的不愉快，工作的不順利，真的不是一兩句話就能説明白的。我相信我們都在學習做個大人，所以太多的話是沒有必要的。突然很想有杯酒，我想一起喝酒，就是我們安慰和鼓勵彼此的最好方式。
3.30pm 回家收拾行李，一個小袋來，三個大袋回去。超累了。
4.30pm 我以爲自己一定上車就馬上入睡，結果我一上車就開始流淚。我以爲自己不會再不捨得離開，結果還是有很多東西讓我不能瀟灑地離開。留著眼淚走完梹威大橋，我覺得畫面是超爛漫的.........
48小時的瘋狂玩轉梹城之旅就這樣結束了。Marvin 說時間太少了。我說：快樂的事太少會覺得人生很無趣，快樂的事太多又會覺得快樂不是那麽珍貴的東西，所以快樂要恰到好處。不要太多，不要太少。
哈，人長大了，原來會慢慢學到知足。
Monday, January 19, 2009
等待的心情
進入倒數新年的日子，也是我倒數離開滾石唱片的日子了。
等待離開的日子是遙遠的，但是當真的要離開的時候，又略嫌離別來得太快了。
這份工作，又是只做了四個月。四個月，是一種詛咒嗎？第一份的營銷工作做了四個月，覺得自己不適合做這份工作辭職了；第二份唱片公司營運部的工作做了四個月，因爲找到了另一份自己理想的工作而要離職了；第三份電視製作公司的製作助理工作跟公司簽了四個月合約員工。四個月，爲什麽偏偏又是四個月？納悶......
等待的心情往往是複雜的。參雜著對未來的憧憬，對離別的惆悵。對未知的不安，對熟悉的眷戀。這樣兩級的情緒不停交叉紛擾，所以等待不是個愉快的經驗。但是也因爲等待，人生才能磨練得更成熟。更成熟處理離別的情緒，更成熟籌劃未來的計劃，更成熟面對等待的熬煉。等待，還是件值得慢慢品味的事。
還有四天，就是我邁入人生另一章的日子了。相較以前，我這次更成熟看待未來。人物，環境，地點也許是上帝精心策劃的，但是情節絕對是我們自己編寫的。按照上帝的心意編寫人生，生命就是一出精彩的故事，票房抑或收視率都會爆燈；按照自己的心意編寫人生，生命就是一出鬧劇，結果賠了本還得面對各種評論。
新的人生，還是一樣，我禱告，上帝握著我的手編寫我全新的一章故事。
等待離開的日子是遙遠的，但是當真的要離開的時候，又略嫌離別來得太快了。
這份工作，又是只做了四個月。四個月，是一種詛咒嗎？第一份的營銷工作做了四個月，覺得自己不適合做這份工作辭職了；第二份唱片公司營運部的工作做了四個月，因爲找到了另一份自己理想的工作而要離職了；第三份電視製作公司的製作助理工作跟公司簽了四個月合約員工。四個月，爲什麽偏偏又是四個月？納悶......
等待的心情往往是複雜的。參雜著對未來的憧憬，對離別的惆悵。對未知的不安，對熟悉的眷戀。這樣兩級的情緒不停交叉紛擾，所以等待不是個愉快的經驗。但是也因爲等待，人生才能磨練得更成熟。更成熟處理離別的情緒，更成熟籌劃未來的計劃，更成熟面對等待的熬煉。等待，還是件值得慢慢品味的事。
還有四天，就是我邁入人生另一章的日子了。相較以前，我這次更成熟看待未來。人物，環境，地點也許是上帝精心策劃的，但是情節絕對是我們自己編寫的。按照上帝的心意編寫人生，生命就是一出精彩的故事，票房抑或收視率都會爆燈；按照自己的心意編寫人生，生命就是一出鬧劇，結果賠了本還得面對各種評論。
新的人生，還是一樣，我禱告，上帝握著我的手編寫我全新的一章故事。
Monday, January 05, 2009
New Year's Resolutions 2009
Yesterday I sent a message to some of my friends. The message as below:
“New Year is coming! Do you have any New Year’s resolutions? Tell me if you have, I want to pray for you! And I will tell you mine if you told me! Hehe! Let’s do it together!”
I always like to do something different to others. When everybody is forward the New Year wishes message, I was thinking to do something DIY. Here come to send a message to ask for their resolutions for the brand new year, and pray together with them, and do together with them, and we can encourage each others. Not just wanna do something new, but really want to pray for them and encourage them. As I share in the article before, I don’t join any ministry yet in KL. Therefore, care for all of my friends is the only ministry that I am able to do now. And I think this is much more important that all the events and program that I done before, to care for those I love.
But quite disappointed, out of more than 100 people I sent, just around 10% reply to me. Some tell me through MSN, “I don’t have New Year’s resolutions ma!” Ok, I accepted the reason. Some just reply me by a forward message and wish me Happy New Year. I wonder whether they were really read through my message? And some even never reply anything. It’s ok. My intention is just to show my care to them, and I have done my part, their respond not under my responsibility. But sometimes after received cold respond, I will wonder, was I done a foolish thing in people’s eyes? Was I disturbed them with this message/action? Was I done a right thing? Of course the intention is good, but was I use the right way to show my care? But thanks God, when somebody told me, “thanks brother! I felt warm of your message!” I know, I should be doing the right thing.
According to Oxford Advanced Learner’s Dictionary 7th Edition, resolutions mean “a firm decision to do or not to do something”. But mostly all of those who replied to me were to tell me their New Year’s wishes. Haha. Some told me their prayer items. Make me wonder, was I used the wrong word?
Anyway, the main purpose of these messages I sent is to pray for them, so, I accept all! Thanks for those who were replied! I will pray for you all.
Here is the collection of all the messages I received. To keep their privacy, I just use the last four digits of their phone number to represent them. If you know someone of them, please pray together with me. You can do it so even you don’t know them. For those who not yet reply, you can reply to me, I can update yours into this list.
New Year’s Resolutions & Prayer Item of my friends:
0559: Jesus is the answer. He is the answer and solution of all questions and problems of every area in life.
1028: Wish I graduate this year, get a secure and good paid job that fulfill my potentials. Love myself and family and friends more, good health, forget the and leap forward with faith, and also me with God.
1068: My resolution is my spiritual life stability and growth in Him, my thesis, my health and my way in front. Am I too greedy?
1164: Keep fit loh. Hope I can find direction in serving God in my church. Hope I won’t give up easily because of some obstacle. And lastly find my future partner.
1688: I want to obtain first class honour! Pray for my final year project.
2237: Pray for my family. Hope God will bless them and have opportunity to listen to gospel. Secondly is my future. Hope God will lead me to the way under his blessing. Third, peace. The last one is my relationship.
3132: Hey, no a specific one, really leh....Also didn't go and think. Just in mind is study only.
4857: Pray for my future direction, memorize bible verse, daily time with God to be improve.
6260: Pray for my career path, health in body and spiritual, my wedding and God’s ministry on hand.
6418: I need a good healthy to serve God better.
6601: Pray for me that I can merry xxx on xx/xx/xxxx, because xxx and my lucky number is x and x.
6706: Pray for my family – my wife and my son. Pray also for the alumni movement this year.
8500: I wish to have a nice job and I can enjoy my working life, most important is wish all people live healthy and happiness!
8672: I got many. I pray that I will be more like Christ! Sensitive in doing his will and work with right heart. These two are most important.
Now is my turn!
Recently I read again the book(Pat Gelsinger, Chief Technology Officer @ Intel). This is a useful book to help us how to balancing our life in serving and working. And in the Chapter 2, the author shows the example on how he prepared his Personal Life Statement. So I also prepare my Personal Life Statement as below:
《我的个人使命宣言》
Personal Life Statement
使命：我要做在任何地方都能正面影响人的基督徒，要管理好神赐给我的各样恩赐，并擅用它去赚取更多回报天父。我要尽量地燃烧自己，去完成神要我在世上完成的工作。
Mission: I want to become a Christian that able to influence others positively, manage all the spiritual gifts that God entrusted to me properly and use it for the glory and kingdom of God. I want to sacrifice all of my life to accomplish the mission that He entrusted to me.
行为准则：（我坚持的事，代表我这个人的价值观）
Standard of My Behavior: (The behavior that I insist, which is my personal moral value)
我会：I will
1． 成为世上的灯塔。我不要成为蜡烛或是油灯，因为它们很快就把自己燃烧完毕，我要成为灯塔，为茫茫人海中寻找方向的人指引通往耶稣的方向。（太二十八18-20）
I want to become the light house of the world. I don’t want to be a candle, or an oil-fired lamp, for they will consume very soon. I hope to become a lighthouse, show the way to Jesus to the seekers. (Matt 28:18-20)
2． 绝不安于现状，我要做带来改变的人，我要求进步。
Never be satisfied of what I have or who I am now, I want to become a person who bringing changes to my life, as well as to others. In other word, always improve myself.
3． 尽力去做每件事。（西三23）
Do everything with all of my hearts. (Col 3:23)
4． 勇敢地接受新的挑战。
Take the new challenges with courageous.
5． 谨言慎行。（雅三6）
Be careful of my words. (James 3:6)
6． 不轻易放弃，持久，忍耐。（罗五3-5）
Never give up easily, endure and persevere. (Romans 5:3-5)
目标：（我要完成的事）
My Goal:
我要：I want to
1． 成为杰出青年，成为众青年的榜样。
Become a good example of youth/ teenagers.
2． 成为杰出的电影/电视工作者，让全世界看到马来西亚的作品。
Become an excellent movie/drama producer, to introduce our local products to all around the world.
3． 在每一部自己的作品中传递耶稣的福音，让更多人认识耶稣基督。
Spread the gospel through my works.
4． 栽培及造就更多的基督青年，成为他们人生旅途中能够互相扶持的人。
Disciples and develop young Christians, become Barnabas in their life.
5． 不断读神的话语，至少一年能把整本圣经读完一遍。
Hunger for God’s word, read through the bible at least once in a year.
6． 背经，两天至少一节新的经文。
Memorize bible verses, two days one new verse.
7． 不断阅读，每天至少阅读一页书。
Keep the habit of reading every day.
8． 成为代祷勇士。
Train myself to become warrior of prayer.
9． 操练奉献的心志
Train and keep the heart of giving (Financially).
Please pray for me, brothers & sisters. I know some of you might think, it is hard to keep the resolutions until the end of the year. I also have the same feeling. But, we human, we learned from one failure to one failure. Maybe you failed to keep it last year, but why not we continue to train ourselves to keep it this year. I think, by pray together and encourage each other more often, don’t you think it will have a higher possibility to keep it until the end of the year?
Finally, I want to wish you all a very happy new year! May you grow in wisdom and I favor with God as you grow in stature.
“New Year is coming! Do you have any New Year’s resolutions? Tell me if you have, I want to pray for you! And I will tell you mine if you told me! Hehe! Let’s do it together!”
I always like to do something different to others. When everybody is forward the New Year wishes message, I was thinking to do something DIY. Here come to send a message to ask for their resolutions for the brand new year, and pray together with them, and do together with them, and we can encourage each others. Not just wanna do something new, but really want to pray for them and encourage them. As I share in the article before, I don’t join any ministry yet in KL. Therefore, care for all of my friends is the only ministry that I am able to do now. And I think this is much more important that all the events and program that I done before, to care for those I love.
But quite disappointed, out of more than 100 people I sent, just around 10% reply to me. Some tell me through MSN, “I don’t have New Year’s resolutions ma!” Ok, I accepted the reason. Some just reply me by a forward message and wish me Happy New Year. I wonder whether they were really read through my message? And some even never reply anything. It’s ok. My intention is just to show my care to them, and I have done my part, their respond not under my responsibility. But sometimes after received cold respond, I will wonder, was I done a foolish thing in people’s eyes? Was I disturbed them with this message/action? Was I done a right thing? Of course the intention is good, but was I use the right way to show my care? But thanks God, when somebody told me, “thanks brother! I felt warm of your message!” I know, I should be doing the right thing.
According to Oxford Advanced Learner’s Dictionary 7th Edition, resolutions mean “a firm decision to do or not to do something”. But mostly all of those who replied to me were to tell me their New Year’s wishes. Haha. Some told me their prayer items. Make me wonder, was I used the wrong word?
Anyway, the main purpose of these messages I sent is to pray for them, so, I accept all! Thanks for those who were replied! I will pray for you all.
Here is the collection of all the messages I received. To keep their privacy, I just use the last four digits of their phone number to represent them. If you know someone of them, please pray together with me. You can do it so even you don’t know them. For those who not yet reply, you can reply to me, I can update yours into this list.
New Year’s Resolutions & Prayer Item of my friends:
0559: Jesus is the answer. He is the answer and solution of all questions and problems of every area in life.
1028: Wish I graduate this year, get a secure and good paid job that fulfill my potentials. Love myself and family and friends more, good health, forget the and leap forward with faith, and also me with God.
1068: My resolution is my spiritual life stability and growth in Him, my thesis, my health and my way in front. Am I too greedy?
1164: Keep fit loh. Hope I can find direction in serving God in my church. Hope I won’t give up easily because of some obstacle. And lastly find my future partner.
1688: I want to obtain first class honour! Pray for my final year project.
2237: Pray for my family. Hope God will bless them and have opportunity to listen to gospel. Secondly is my future. Hope God will lead me to the way under his blessing. Third, peace. The last one is my relationship.
3132: Hey, no a specific one, really leh....Also didn't go and think. Just in mind is study only.
4857: Pray for my future direction, memorize bible verse, daily time with God to be improve.
6260: Pray for my career path, health in body and spiritual, my wedding and God’s ministry on hand.
6418: I need a good healthy to serve God better.
6601: Pray for me that I can merry xxx on xx/xx/xxxx, because xxx and my lucky number is x and x.
6706: Pray for my family – my wife and my son. Pray also for the alumni movement this year.
8500: I wish to have a nice job and I can enjoy my working life, most important is wish all people live healthy and happiness!
8672: I got many. I pray that I will be more like Christ! Sensitive in doing his will and work with right heart. These two are most important.
Now is my turn!
Recently I read again the book
《我的个人使命宣言》
Personal Life Statement
使命：我要做在任何地方都能正面影响人的基督徒，要管理好神赐给我的各样恩赐，并擅用它去赚取更多回报天父。我要尽量地燃烧自己，去完成神要我在世上完成的工作。
Mission: I want to become a Christian that able to influence others positively, manage all the spiritual gifts that God entrusted to me properly and use it for the glory and kingdom of God. I want to sacrifice all of my life to accomplish the mission that He entrusted to me.
行为准则：（我坚持的事，代表我这个人的价值观）
Standard of My Behavior: (The behavior that I insist, which is my personal moral value)
我会：I will
1． 成为世上的灯塔。我不要成为蜡烛或是油灯，因为它们很快就把自己燃烧完毕，我要成为灯塔，为茫茫人海中寻找方向的人指引通往耶稣的方向。（太二十八18-20）
I want to become the light house of the world. I don’t want to be a candle, or an oil-fired lamp, for they will consume very soon. I hope to become a lighthouse, show the way to Jesus to the seekers. (Matt 28:18-20)
2． 绝不安于现状，我要做带来改变的人，我要求进步。
Never be satisfied of what I have or who I am now, I want to become a person who bringing changes to my life, as well as to others. In other word, always improve myself.
3． 尽力去做每件事。（西三23）
Do everything with all of my hearts. (Col 3:23)
4． 勇敢地接受新的挑战。
Take the new challenges with courageous.
5． 谨言慎行。（雅三6）
Be careful of my words. (James 3:6)
6． 不轻易放弃，持久，忍耐。（罗五3-5）
Never give up easily, endure and persevere. (Romans 5:3-5)
目标：（我要完成的事）
My Goal:
我要：I want to
1． 成为杰出青年，成为众青年的榜样。
Become a good example of youth/ teenagers.
2． 成为杰出的电影/电视工作者，让全世界看到马来西亚的作品。
Become an excellent movie/drama producer, to introduce our local products to all around the world.
3． 在每一部自己的作品中传递耶稣的福音，让更多人认识耶稣基督。
Spread the gospel through my works.
4． 栽培及造就更多的基督青年，成为他们人生旅途中能够互相扶持的人。
Disciples and develop young Christians, become Barnabas in their life.
5． 不断读神的话语，至少一年能把整本圣经读完一遍。
Hunger for God’s word, read through the bible at least once in a year.
6． 背经，两天至少一节新的经文。
Memorize bible verses, two days one new verse.
7． 不断阅读，每天至少阅读一页书。
Keep the habit of reading every day.
8． 成为代祷勇士。
Train myself to become warrior of prayer.
9． 操练奉献的心志
Train and keep the heart of giving (Financially).
Please pray for me, brothers & sisters. I know some of you might think, it is hard to keep the resolutions until the end of the year. I also have the same feeling. But, we human, we learned from one failure to one failure. Maybe you failed to keep it last year, but why not we continue to train ourselves to keep it this year. I think, by pray together and encourage each other more often, don’t you think it will have a higher possibility to keep it until the end of the year?
Finally, I want to wish you all a very happy new year! May you grow in wisdom and I favor with God as you grow in stature.
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